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May. 23rd, 2002 11:20 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
mikailborgOkay, so now I'm going to ask my questions about Episode 2, and hopefully get them out of my system.
1) Artoo is a droid, and doesn't need to sleep until his batteries run down (which, judging by available evidence, takes a long time). He's been assigned security duty for a diplomat who was just the target of an attempted assasination this morning.Why was he asleep?!?
2) Does Coruscant have *any* sort of traffic control? Or do they just trust that everyone in a flying car is no danger to himself and others?
3) Why did Jango Fett decide he needed a kid? What kind of upbringing could that kid possibly have had? And how did Boba Fett really expect his mercenary bounty hunter dad to die - in his sleep? For that matter, did Jango consider that?
4) Jedi aren't really that useful, are they? They are arrogant, tend to answer your direct questions with vapid platitudes, and really can't handle more than three or four bad guys at once. In fact, Luke and Qui-Gon are the only two Jedi that I've yet seen actually complete an assigned or chosen mission.
4a) While I'm on the subject, exactly how were a couple thousand sentients with swords (admittedly keen ones, but swords nonetheless) keeping together a government of hundreds of thousands of star systems? Did everyone in the Republic (including the Sith) just decide to play nice for a thousand years until Palpatine showed up?
5) Just how loving a son was Anakin to leave his mother in slavery for 10 years? He didn't care then, why does he suddenly care now?
6) And how freaking convenient is it that Shmi survives for a month in a Tusken camp just so she'll be ready to die in her son's arms the moment he arrives?
7) Am I really supposed to belive that both protocol droids and battle droids have Plug-n-Play parts? And exactly where was C-3PO's intelligence center: head, or chest? The movie bizarrely implies both.
8) I love Samuel Jackson, but I'm curious to know exactly what Mace Windu's plan was on Geonosis? Was he making it up as he went? Why didn't he take out a few of the lead bad guys while he was standing there with a saber blade at their throats? Is he going to have a couple hundred angry Jedi apparitions keeping him up nights for a while?
9) Why is a mostly non-combatant Senator Amidala the only one to realise that a distance weapon might come in handy in the big fight?
10) Why could Yoda, regarded as the greatest Jedi warrior of legend, not defeat one aging horror movie star? And don't tell me he wasn't beaten. His mission was to stop Dooku, and he failed (and got two more wounded Jedi to clean up).That will do for noe, but I have a final comment - you have to appreciate Palpatine. Here's a man that has more backup plans than the Impossible Missions Force used to. He's agot all the peices on the board so perfectly arranged that his plan will go forward no mastter what. This takes brains.And he also has enough sense of irony to send his own Republic-conquering army in to save the last ragged remmnant of the Jedi. Style, baby.
1) Artoo is a droid, and doesn't need to sleep until his batteries run down (which, judging by available evidence, takes a long time). He's been assigned security duty for a diplomat who was just the target of an attempted assasination this morning.Why was he asleep?!?
2) Does Coruscant have *any* sort of traffic control? Or do they just trust that everyone in a flying car is no danger to himself and others?
3) Why did Jango Fett decide he needed a kid? What kind of upbringing could that kid possibly have had? And how did Boba Fett really expect his mercenary bounty hunter dad to die - in his sleep? For that matter, did Jango consider that?
4) Jedi aren't really that useful, are they? They are arrogant, tend to answer your direct questions with vapid platitudes, and really can't handle more than three or four bad guys at once. In fact, Luke and Qui-Gon are the only two Jedi that I've yet seen actually complete an assigned or chosen mission.
4a) While I'm on the subject, exactly how were a couple thousand sentients with swords (admittedly keen ones, but swords nonetheless) keeping together a government of hundreds of thousands of star systems? Did everyone in the Republic (including the Sith) just decide to play nice for a thousand years until Palpatine showed up?
5) Just how loving a son was Anakin to leave his mother in slavery for 10 years? He didn't care then, why does he suddenly care now?
6) And how freaking convenient is it that Shmi survives for a month in a Tusken camp just so she'll be ready to die in her son's arms the moment he arrives?
7) Am I really supposed to belive that both protocol droids and battle droids have Plug-n-Play parts? And exactly where was C-3PO's intelligence center: head, or chest? The movie bizarrely implies both.
8) I love Samuel Jackson, but I'm curious to know exactly what Mace Windu's plan was on Geonosis? Was he making it up as he went? Why didn't he take out a few of the lead bad guys while he was standing there with a saber blade at their throats? Is he going to have a couple hundred angry Jedi apparitions keeping him up nights for a while?
9) Why is a mostly non-combatant Senator Amidala the only one to realise that a distance weapon might come in handy in the big fight?
10) Why could Yoda, regarded as the greatest Jedi warrior of legend, not defeat one aging horror movie star? And don't tell me he wasn't beaten. His mission was to stop Dooku, and he failed (and got two more wounded Jedi to clean up).That will do for noe, but I have a final comment - you have to appreciate Palpatine. Here's a man that has more backup plans than the Impossible Missions Force used to. He's agot all the peices on the board so perfectly arranged that his plan will go forward no mastter what. This takes brains.And he also has enough sense of irony to send his own Republic-conquering army in to save the last ragged remmnant of the Jedi. Style, baby.
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Date: 2002-05-24 01:25 am (UTC)1. Padme was cool to me perhaps because I saw the movie in such close proximity to Spiderman. Padme is like "let me kick ass now" whereas M.J. was like "let me whine and get rescued".
2. Padme was not cool to me because she fell in love with her stalker. Hello, can I get an intergalactic restraining order on this guy? He's upset because she kissed someone else when she was 12 and in the Model U.N.??
3. Which brings me to Anakin: Creepy. I mean, I know he's supposed to be foreshadowing, but please. He's more like forehammering. And I really can't tell if the kid can act because, for chrissakes, the dialogue written for him was just. so. bad. I'd much, much rather have Tobey M... heh. Let's put it this way; I enjoyed Jar Jar more than Anakin.
4. What is with the like, 5 different "Oops! I lost my lightsaber!" scenes?? I'd think a Jedi would be trained to sacrifice his nuts before his lightsaber hand. I was irritated with the ways the force conveniently worked and didn't work depending on what was needed for the plot.
5. Yoda - As I said, they should have named the movie Episode 2: Attack of Yoda. I will say I think I actually kind of prefer him as a muppet than as CG.
6. I maintain that Samuel L. Jackson was way too Samuel-L-Jacksoney to make him believable.
So, beyond that stuff, I went back and watched the original. I'd seen it maybe, 15 years ago and that's it. It was
1. Padme was cool to me perhaps because I saw the movie in such close proximity to Spiderman. Padme is like "let me kick ass now" whereas M.J. was like "let me whine and get rescued".
2. Padme was not cool to me because she fell in love with her stalker. Hello, can I get an intergalactic restraining order on this guy? He's upset because she kissed someone else when she was 12 and in the Model U.N.??
3. Which brings me to Anakin: Creepy. I mean, I know he's supposed to be foreshadowing, but please. He's more like forehammering. And I really can't tell if the kid can act because, for chrissakes, the dialogue written for him was just. so. bad. I'd much, much rather have Tobey M... heh. Let's put it this way; I enjoyed Jar Jar more than Anakin.
4. What is with the like, 5 different "Oops! I lost my lightsaber!" scenes?? I'd think a Jedi would be trained to sacrifice his nuts before his lightsaber hand. I was irritated with the ways the force conveniently worked and didn't work depending on what was needed for the plot.
5. Yoda - As I said, they should have named the movie Episode 2: Attack of Yoda. I will say I think I actually kind of prefer him as a muppet than as CG.
6. I maintain that Samuel L. Jackson was way too Samuel-L-Jacksoney to make him believable.
So, beyond that stuff, I went back and watched the original. I'd seen it maybe, 15 years ago and that's it. It was <i?so</i> much better. I know I said it before, but I can't say it enough. I mean, who wrote the dialogue for Ep. 4, and who wrote it for Ep. 2??? The droid banter in 4 is charming, amusing, yet still germane to the atmosphere. The princess-han-luke interaction is quick, quippy, doesn't distract from the action, and is vaguely even believable. I plan to watch Empire next week, which I don't think I have seen since about 10 years ago. At any rate, the more I talk about it, the more I get irritated...